...Relax.
Every year I make resolutions. I think they're a good way to reflect on the past year, and reflect on the coming year and see what I need improvement on.
The best resolution I actually kept was in 2004 - the year I turned eighteen. I bought a diary from WH Smith's and everyday, for a whole year I wrote down what I had spent that day. On the back page, I'd write a monthly total, until I found out how much I had spent that year.
This year my four areas are:
Home and Garden
We bought our home in February, 2014. It was a short sale at a grossly reduced price and in need of a little tender loving care. The reduced price meant we could buy the home outright. Not bad for a then and thirty-two year old and twenty-seven year old.
The home was built in 1983 and is now thirty-three years old. So we have done a lot of projects, and this year I hope to have them finished so we can relax - and put our feet up.
Grow Our Family
This will be our seventeenth month of trying to conceive. Infertility isn't for the faint of heart. I have joined a group online and know that we're not alone, but the stories have opened my heart.
One member who is an ER nurse said a lady came into the ER on NYE with a broken needle in her arm. She was an addict and sadly pregnant. Then another commented that she works as a nurse in NAS and looks after babies as they go through withdrawal after being born to an addicted mothers - all while suffering through infertility. It breaks my heart, I can't imagine how much it must break their hearts.
We've discussed other options - one being adoption. We're going to the CAS informational meeting next week. We spent much of the weekend talking about adoption and don't take the decision lightly.
Whatever the God's plan is for our life, we're planning on taking a break - until my thirtieth birthday at the end of May to relax and focus on wellness.
Wellness
Due to the medications I've taken in the past year, or so to conceive I've gained a few pounds. So this year I would like get back down to 130 - 135 pounds. It's the ideal weight for me not to feel too twiggy as I'm only 5'2.
I have my blood taken every month (unexplained infertility), and take countless vitamins so all my levels are A+. My blood pressure, cholesterol and blood sugar numbers are good too. We rarely, if ever drink and have never smoked or done any drugs. So besides loosing weight, my overall physical health is good.
I want to improve my mental wellness, by relaxing and not worrying, or ruminating about the infertility and find peace in versus like Matthew 11:28.
Genealogy
Ever since the losses in my family I have pursued Genealogy. I have gathered all mine, and my hubby's family pictures and scanned them. I have an album for our ancestry, and an ancestors wall on our stairway, an album for each of our childhoods, and an album for the past five years.
I just have to relax and realize they've passed, and not be so hard on myself for my unfinished list, as I probably already have/know more than the majority of those my age. We've managed to travel a thousand years back in time, to England, Wales, Scotland, Ireland, Germany and Hungry - the stories leave me in awe.
What are your resolutions? Do you have a "word" for the year?
~Kiki Nakita ~
